Saturday, March 15, 2025

My Birthday Report

 So I turned 47 yesterday. How did the birthday go, you ask? Well it went very very well. 

I was blown away by the outpouring of well wishes from almost everyone I know. Even people I had barely met reached out to wish me a happy birthday. I got Facebook wishes from people I met donkeys years ago. I mean I know it's Facebook so it doesn't really count, but the truth is it was still heartwarming. 

I spent the day taking of myself. A mani pedi, a massage and a facial. It was good but it had elements of pain in everything. I was super uncomfortable during the mani pedi. The massage was amazing and that was the best part of the day. The facial was incredibly, incredibly painful but in the end, worth it. My face is all nice and smooth although I have a bit of a Rudolph look going on. 

So it was a nice feeling and I am quite proud of myself and the self-care I gave myself. The real chicken soup for the soul moment happened the day before when I realised that for the first time I was in a company that I could be myself in. I don't have to pretend and I don't have to hide. I can be on a diet without any repercussions or unsolicited advice. 

For the first time in a long time I have hope that I am going to lose the weight on my own. 

Just Me!

Thursday, November 21, 2024

Bits & Bobs

 He's so strong Pez. So brave. He's been through so much already. He's survived...

'Ok...I get it, you're in love with him. The question remains why are you not proposing to him?'


He was forced to hide who he was by his family. He was forced into a role he disliked by the Crown. He was forced to come out because of a media scandal. Hell I forced him into this relationship. He had decided to walk away Pez. I came after him. I can't be sorry about that because I would do it again. I can't live without him in my life. I love him Pez, I can't let him go but I will be damned if I take another decision away from him!

"Alex..." 

Pez, can I have a moment alone with my boyfriend? 


Thursday, May 25, 2023

ALL THE SKILLS THAT GOT YOU PROMOTED ARE NO LONGER RELEVANT

 Today was eye opening. 

It also brought out the competitive side of me. I need to take control of my job. I have spent too long fighting fires. I need to spend more time making things less flammable. 

I realise that as much as I would like to believe that I am able to multi-task and I am actually able to well enough, the unfinished business looming in the background throws me. 

I cannot focus on the task at hand because my neuro divergent brain is still harping on some unfinished thing in the background. 

I realise that maybe the anti-anxiety medications didn't actually make that much of a difference because it was not the correct medication for me. I need ADHD medication not anxiety meds. 

Just Me.

Monday, May 01, 2023

ADHD

Is it hypochondria or am I actually as ADHD as I think I am?

All the symptoms fit. All the side effects. 

I have the accompanying ADHD body and depression. 

I don't know why it matters to me. Who cares if I actually have ADHD? What material difference does that make? Is there any way knowing this is going to make things easier for me?

Yet, I feel relieved. I feel relieved knowing I am not the only who feels this way. That I have a community to reach out to. 

Not that I am ever going to. 

Just Me!

Friday, May 06, 2022

DECEPTION

Propaganda, misinformation, disinformation. These are the big guns of the political spin machine.  

Whatever happened to "The Truth Shall Set You Free." I try to convince myself that there must have been a time when truth was the only thing that mattered. I would like to believe that at some point we were not cynical 'realists'. 

I know better though. Deception comes entirely too easily to us. It is something that we learn in the crib. We learn manipulation as we learn to walk and talk and feed ourselves. Of course most of us, only use deception in the most dire of circumstances or in the most trivial of matters. 

There are however a select few who are true artistes; who turn deception into an art form. 

Just Me. 


Saturday, April 30, 2022

THE GREAT RESIGNATION

Millenials have a skewed sense of reality. 

Millenials are pampered and spoiled. 

Millenial employees are holding employers to ransom with their unreasonable demands.

Businesses are at the mercy of staff with poor committment levels and high wage expectations. 


These are so many of the observations that are floating around recently. Anytime you have a conversation with a business owner, this is the response most of them have. The general consensus is that it is all the fault of the employees who are 'money-grabbing, lazy and unreasonable'. The generational gap has the younger generations painted as more interested in social media without a solid grasp of reality. 

I am of an older generation yet I empathise with both sides of this issue. I understand that the trauma of being the pioneer generation has set most of these 'business owners' down a a spiralling of path of us against them mentality. 

What triggered this bout of introspection?

I heard about the absolute disaster situation happening at my penultimate place of work. The company is 12 years old and should be well established by this point. However, the staff are on the whole unhappy, dissatisfied and on the lookout for greener pastures. The owners however, have an almost universal world view that the staff are ungrateful and unreasonable and lazy. 

However, I think it is the one of the silver linings of this pandemic. Everyone has had a rude awakening and a shock to their system. People are reevaluating their circumstances. People are learning that there other ways to survive and different perspectives. While everyone understands the importance of money and how necessary it is for survival, the pandemic freed people from the sense of the conventional. We are all more comfortable with uncertainty. 

Employers who understand this and adapt to it are the ones who are successfully retaining quality employees. I am not saying that there aren't people out there who are unreasonable and spoilt. In general, employees are no longer willing to put up with terrible working conditions. The pandemic has driven home what exactly it means to have a toxic work environment. 

Employers have no choice but to roll with the punches. Currently, the change is cosmetic and reluctant. Employers are insituting stop gap measures out of fear. However, once this measure start showing positive outcomes, these changes will start taking root. It will be for the better. Like all change, it is slow to happen and it is frustrating trying to get the ideas to take root. 

Just Me. 


Friday, April 22, 2022

INDIFFERENCE

The Secrets of Dumbledore

This started off with the Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. 
When did the segue happen? More importantly, why the segue?
And honestly, I think all this Dumbledore being the all fired chosen one is annoying. 
Harry Potter being the all fired chosen one was super annoying as well. 
And here we have Newt who is incredibly talented and amazingly under valued. 

I don't know if this trilogy was intended from the start or just sort of made up as they went along. 
It feels like the the latter, truth be told. 
I would expect that someone of Rowling's caliber to be able to put the story together a bit better than that. 

It was disconcerting in the very least to suddenly find Tina Goldstein out of the picture for Newt's triumph. I understand that she's promoted and it's an important position, but Newt is the man she's in love with, embarking on a life threatening mission to save her sister! 

It's all very 2 dimensional. It was a slow build and I felt like that they ran out of time to cover everything they really wanted to. 

On the more liberal side of things, there is the gay romance between Dumbledore and Grimelwald. There's no accounting for taste of course, but it is utterly mind boggling that Albus found anything to love in Gellert and vice versa. 

This is another prime example of the 2 dimensional characterisation. 

I did not hate it but I did not love it. 
I am indifferent. 

Just Me.