Over the years, I have played Agony Aunt to many, many friends and I've noticed a pattern. Their complaints mainly center around a single theme: relationships. I've heard many variations of this theme; a total lack of a relationship, an over abundance of relationships, not being able to get into or out of a relationship, bad relationships, good relationships, one-sided relationships, even some imaginary relationships. The bottom line is, I've heard them all.
Based on my varied experience, listening to the relationship woes of both sexes, I have a working theory. Many of these problems are caused because too much emphasis is placed on appearance. Even my 'enlightened' male friends, and my 'liberated' female friends all hinge their courtship rituals on appearance. Everyone does this absurd dating dance where they spend a ridiculous amount of time worrying about how to make the first move without actually making the first move, or how to make the other side make the first move. There is an unbelievable amount of stress that goes into attaining this almost mythological 'first move'.
Now after extensive studies, I have observed that what constitutes a first move is different for both genders. On the one hand with women, the first move involves the man asking them out which seems on the face of it, straightforward enough. But nothing is ever that simple. There are certain criteria to the 'asking out'; for instance, it has to be individual, he can't ask you and five other friends, and while the first time need not be dinner and a movie, it can't be the local mamak for an after work 'yam cha' either. My female friend are adamant that they would not do anything until this happens. Even in this day and age, my friends refuse to be the ones to do the asking. I actually have friends who won't even show interest until the guy asks them out.
On the other hand with men, a first move constitutes a show of interest. Any woman out there who thinks men have it easy, has no clue the pressures these boys put on themselves. You see, being men, they haven't exactly defined for themselves what amounts to a show of interest. However, with their fragile egos thrown in the mix, this lack of definition muddies the waters. Men will wait until the get what they perceive to be a sign of interest because they hope that receiving that sign reduces the chance of rejection. In fact, men have a whole defence mechanisms built around avoiding rejection. Really, who can blame them, because let's face it, rejection sucks.
So there's where it stands, my guy friends play it cool and my girl friends play hard to get, but both sides agree, the last thing they want is to look desperate. I'm amazed any of my friends ever got hitched!
I have never bought in to all this hype about first appearances. In my mind, it's all very simple - if the guy is the sort who gets freaked out by a woman who asks him out, he's not the one for me anyway, so it's no skin off my back. If he is the sort of guy who forms a negative opinion of a woman who makes the first move, then I want nothing to do with him and he has no idea what he's missing.
I believe in the old adage: "Be yourself, no matter how crazy or weird. Those who matter won't mind, and those who do, don't matter."
Just Me.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Opening the Pandora's Box...
I was standing in line to buy my cinema ticket to Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull at GSC One Utama yesterday, something I haven't done in a long, long, time. A young couple slipped into the line behind me and started talking. Being alone in the line, I was soon shamelessly eavesdropping on their conversation. (Yes, I know, I know...pathetic, but you hear the most interesting things that way) Anyway, this young couple soon began discussing the selection of movies on offer at the cinema and I use the term discussing loosely here. What I really mean is that they were riduculing each movie and trying to see who could come up with the more disparaging comment. Inwardly I was rolling my eyes, 'one of those' I thought. You know the ones I mean. It's the type who go watch "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" and then walk away saying 'oh I didn't like it, it was too much like a cartoon'. Those sort. The pretentious nitwits who have no idea what they like in a film but run it down anyway, because they are too cool for it. Right before I go off on a tangent, let me tell about the single comment that really caught my attention. They soon began talking about Indiana Jones, naturally, and the young man had only one thing to say about it: "Retarded!"
Obviously I was intrigued by this scathing retort, especially as I was stuck in a hellishly long line about to fork out my rapidly dwindling savings for a ticket to see this movie. I was convinced that this comment was just more of the same 'I'm too cool to breath' crap that they were spewing and soon had put it out of my mind. After all, it's Indiana Jones that I was about to go and watch. I hardly expected it to be a goldmine of information nor a fount of knowledge. I had no illusions. I was going to watch a movie that was purely entertaining; like a roller coaster ride at the fair.
I staggered out of the cinema two hours later and only one ran through my mind. You guessed it, "Retarded!" Even with my low standards, it was appalling. It was so retarded that as I write this, barely a day later, I can hardly remember much of the movie. What I do remember does it no credit. Harrison Ford can't possibly be that hard up for money that he would stoop to reprising a role that he's at least 25 years too old for. I don't care how he aged, he's no Sean Connery and he honestly couldn't carry off Indy. The whole appeal of Indiana Jones was somehow gone. His lines were unfunny, his movements were stilted and the plot - OH MY GOD! - the plot was mind-numbingly inane. I hardly think even a twelve year would have been all that impressed with this movie. I know the pre-teen boys in the row behind weren't. In fact they were insulted by the lack of intelligence in the movie. In times when most children are growing up on a diet of series like CSI and Numb3rs, it is highly insulting that the writers ask anyone to believe that gunpowder will float through the air being drawn magnetically to the carcass of a dead alien.
Indiana Jones should have been allowed a noble and dignified death, instead of being dredged up and lampooned like he was. On a side note, Shia LeBoeuf acquitted himself very well in the movie. The boy has oodles of talents and bushels of mass appeal and truth be told, I think his future in the industry is bright, provided he doesn't go the Lohan/Downey Jr. road.
So Indiana Jones was a bust, but there was still hope left in my Pandora's box of sorrows, or so I thought. Last night, two friends and I went to watch "Prince Caspian". Now unlike my naive friend, who re-read the book just last week to prepare herself for this 'event', I last read "Prince Caspian" about 5 years when this same friend presented me with the entire collection. Read them all in one sitting and haven't gone back to them since; in fact, I can't even find the book now. Anyway, that being the case, I watched "The Chronicles of Narnia" and I absolutely loved it. The children were a little stilted in their acting, but somehow, for that story and against that backdrop, it simply worked.
So it was with some pretty high expectations that we entered the darkened cinema. Unfortunately for me, disappointment had to decided to make a day of it. "Prince Caspian" while nowhere near the 'retarded' mess of Indiana Jones, it was still disappointing. I have learned my lesson after the fiasco that was "Lord of the Rings" and nowadays I try not to watch a movie based on a book if I have already read the book and if I do, no longer do I expect it at all to match the book in anyway. Many a well written book has been taken apart and disfigured by the demons 'artistic license' and 'mass appeal'. I digress; the point I was trying to make was that I had no such illusions about the fact that some changes would have to be made in order to fit it into a two and a half hour movie, but little did I expect this. It's like the screenwriters read the first page of the book and the last page and then decided to re-write the bits in between however they wanted.
Unlike Indiana Jones, this movie will appeal to the pre-teens and the spectacular shots, amazing creatures and the fantastic CGI will carry the movie. For those, who enjoyed the writings of CS Lewis however, it will prove riduculously trite. For adults who haven't read the book, enjoy the scenery and CGI because you're not going to experience a lot of first rate acting or even a decent plotline. All in all "Prince Caspian" turned out to be one of those movies which have to rely on the CGI to save it. I can understand that in a lot the original screenplay, but when you've already been handed the storyline by one of the greatest storytellers of his time, to massacre this movie, was a crime, I don't think I'll be able to forgive or forget for some time to come.
Just Me.
Obviously I was intrigued by this scathing retort, especially as I was stuck in a hellishly long line about to fork out my rapidly dwindling savings for a ticket to see this movie. I was convinced that this comment was just more of the same 'I'm too cool to breath' crap that they were spewing and soon had put it out of my mind. After all, it's Indiana Jones that I was about to go and watch. I hardly expected it to be a goldmine of information nor a fount of knowledge. I had no illusions. I was going to watch a movie that was purely entertaining; like a roller coaster ride at the fair.
I staggered out of the cinema two hours later and only one ran through my mind. You guessed it, "Retarded!" Even with my low standards, it was appalling. It was so retarded that as I write this, barely a day later, I can hardly remember much of the movie. What I do remember does it no credit. Harrison Ford can't possibly be that hard up for money that he would stoop to reprising a role that he's at least 25 years too old for. I don't care how he aged, he's no Sean Connery and he honestly couldn't carry off Indy. The whole appeal of Indiana Jones was somehow gone. His lines were unfunny, his movements were stilted and the plot - OH MY GOD! - the plot was mind-numbingly inane. I hardly think even a twelve year would have been all that impressed with this movie. I know the pre-teen boys in the row behind weren't. In fact they were insulted by the lack of intelligence in the movie. In times when most children are growing up on a diet of series like CSI and Numb3rs, it is highly insulting that the writers ask anyone to believe that gunpowder will float through the air being drawn magnetically to the carcass of a dead alien.
Indiana Jones should have been allowed a noble and dignified death, instead of being dredged up and lampooned like he was. On a side note, Shia LeBoeuf acquitted himself very well in the movie. The boy has oodles of talents and bushels of mass appeal and truth be told, I think his future in the industry is bright, provided he doesn't go the Lohan/Downey Jr. road.
So Indiana Jones was a bust, but there was still hope left in my Pandora's box of sorrows, or so I thought. Last night, two friends and I went to watch "Prince Caspian". Now unlike my naive friend, who re-read the book just last week to prepare herself for this 'event', I last read "Prince Caspian" about 5 years when this same friend presented me with the entire collection. Read them all in one sitting and haven't gone back to them since; in fact, I can't even find the book now. Anyway, that being the case, I watched "The Chronicles of Narnia" and I absolutely loved it. The children were a little stilted in their acting, but somehow, for that story and against that backdrop, it simply worked.
So it was with some pretty high expectations that we entered the darkened cinema. Unfortunately for me, disappointment had to decided to make a day of it. "Prince Caspian" while nowhere near the 'retarded' mess of Indiana Jones, it was still disappointing. I have learned my lesson after the fiasco that was "Lord of the Rings" and nowadays I try not to watch a movie based on a book if I have already read the book and if I do, no longer do I expect it at all to match the book in anyway. Many a well written book has been taken apart and disfigured by the demons 'artistic license' and 'mass appeal'. I digress; the point I was trying to make was that I had no such illusions about the fact that some changes would have to be made in order to fit it into a two and a half hour movie, but little did I expect this. It's like the screenwriters read the first page of the book and the last page and then decided to re-write the bits in between however they wanted.
Unlike Indiana Jones, this movie will appeal to the pre-teens and the spectacular shots, amazing creatures and the fantastic CGI will carry the movie. For those, who enjoyed the writings of CS Lewis however, it will prove riduculously trite. For adults who haven't read the book, enjoy the scenery and CGI because you're not going to experience a lot of first rate acting or even a decent plotline. All in all "Prince Caspian" turned out to be one of those movies which have to rely on the CGI to save it. I can understand that in a lot the original screenplay, but when you've already been handed the storyline by one of the greatest storytellers of his time, to massacre this movie, was a crime, I don't think I'll be able to forgive or forget for some time to come.
Just Me.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Simplicity
This is me simply typing because I like the sensation of typing. I write because I like the feel of the nib of the pen against the paper. I enjoy seeing the words form on a blank sheet of paper, literally or virtually. Does this make me odd? I would like to think not. However, it does not make me a writer either. It simply means I have an odd sort of fascination for the act of writing. Whether this fascination stems from the belief that I can write or from the fear that I cannot, I do not yet know. I hope to discover the answer to this question, perhaps soon.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Reality...
Reality TV. I can hear the groans already. The truth of it is though, that no matter how much a person may moan and groan about the declining standards of television programming, reality TV is the big winner. There is simply something addictive about watching an 'ordinary' person do extraordinary things, or survive outlandish situations. It doesn't matter that these people are handpicked to skew the show the way the producers want it to go.
Many a friend of mine will look down their noses at the thought of watching reality TV, then, turn around and religiously watch, Come Dine with Me or perhaps something like The Amazing Race. The bottom line is that watching contestants who are shorter, fatter and not so pretty looking, gives us the sense that it could be us out there. It gets the audience invested in the exploits of these contestants. It gets the audience invested in what happens to these contestants.
The biggest and most watched reality TV on any channel right now is the news. Yes, that's right. It's the local and international news. It's stories of how people thousands of miles away from us have to deal with maybe the same problems we deal with everyday. They have the same concerns about putting food on the table, of being able to set foot outside the house without the fear of ending up dead; they like us, want to be able to live a good and happy life. The specifics of what they each deal with may be different, a tornado in the US, a cyclone in Myanmar, and earthquake in China and maybe just poverty in Ethiopia, but the human drama driving it is the same the world over. Just like the most outrageous reality TV, the news is also streamlined and packaged and delivered for maximum impact. Little stories that fit a 'theme' are sensationalised. Big stories which are oddballs, are snowed under piles of gibberish.
Just like we can't look away from the News, we can't bring ourselves to look away from the contestants, the participants, the guinea pigs of reality TV. Ten years ago, the producers of reality TV would wait for something interesting to happen and compile it, then throw it into one show with maybe a little bit of reenactment and voila! The masses were satisfied. Programmes like Rescue 911! and You Asked For It were runaway hits. Of course in our fast paced, forward moving world, television has to keep up or be outstripped. So instead of waiting for reality television to happen, some smart-aleck televsion executive thought, why not make our own reality.
This is the reason for the popularity of these shows. It's not because American Idol is really about finding the next big pop sensation, although that may have been the original idea. Finding the next big thing is not the reason that American Idol has run for seven seasons. After seven years on the air, only Kelly Clarkson has achieved any kind of international stardom. Not many people outside the US have even heard of Ruben Studdard or Taylor Hicks or even Carrie Underwood. Yet many young hopefuls who have been voted off have gone on to bigger and better things. Daughtry and Jennifer Hudson are prime examples. Daughtry is now the most popular band in the US and they're immensely popular all over the world. One might even say that losing on American Idol is better for a musician's career than winning ever is.
This is because American Idol is not a talent competition. It is a case of FOX building it's own reality. They handpick contestants who will show well on camera, who are dramatic, who have hard luck stories, who are young. Go to the American Idol website and you will have die hard fans of second rate contestants duking it out over the fairness of the voting system. These fans tune every week and are bombarded with advertising and media messages and spend thousands voting for the favourites. It's become a reality of its own and the people behind it may even be having a little bit of a God complex right about now. The thing to remember is that human creation is imperfect, we sow the seeds of destruction is everything we build or create.
Let's see how long it will be before people realise that reality isn't to be found inside an electronic box, it's what you do with the time you've been given.
Just Me.
Many a friend of mine will look down their noses at the thought of watching reality TV, then, turn around and religiously watch, Come Dine with Me or perhaps something like The Amazing Race. The bottom line is that watching contestants who are shorter, fatter and not so pretty looking, gives us the sense that it could be us out there. It gets the audience invested in the exploits of these contestants. It gets the audience invested in what happens to these contestants.
The biggest and most watched reality TV on any channel right now is the news. Yes, that's right. It's the local and international news. It's stories of how people thousands of miles away from us have to deal with maybe the same problems we deal with everyday. They have the same concerns about putting food on the table, of being able to set foot outside the house without the fear of ending up dead; they like us, want to be able to live a good and happy life. The specifics of what they each deal with may be different, a tornado in the US, a cyclone in Myanmar, and earthquake in China and maybe just poverty in Ethiopia, but the human drama driving it is the same the world over. Just like the most outrageous reality TV, the news is also streamlined and packaged and delivered for maximum impact. Little stories that fit a 'theme' are sensationalised. Big stories which are oddballs, are snowed under piles of gibberish.
Just like we can't look away from the News, we can't bring ourselves to look away from the contestants, the participants, the guinea pigs of reality TV. Ten years ago, the producers of reality TV would wait for something interesting to happen and compile it, then throw it into one show with maybe a little bit of reenactment and voila! The masses were satisfied. Programmes like Rescue 911! and You Asked For It were runaway hits. Of course in our fast paced, forward moving world, television has to keep up or be outstripped. So instead of waiting for reality television to happen, some smart-aleck televsion executive thought, why not make our own reality.
This is the reason for the popularity of these shows. It's not because American Idol is really about finding the next big pop sensation, although that may have been the original idea. Finding the next big thing is not the reason that American Idol has run for seven seasons. After seven years on the air, only Kelly Clarkson has achieved any kind of international stardom. Not many people outside the US have even heard of Ruben Studdard or Taylor Hicks or even Carrie Underwood. Yet many young hopefuls who have been voted off have gone on to bigger and better things. Daughtry and Jennifer Hudson are prime examples. Daughtry is now the most popular band in the US and they're immensely popular all over the world. One might even say that losing on American Idol is better for a musician's career than winning ever is.
This is because American Idol is not a talent competition. It is a case of FOX building it's own reality. They handpick contestants who will show well on camera, who are dramatic, who have hard luck stories, who are young. Go to the American Idol website and you will have die hard fans of second rate contestants duking it out over the fairness of the voting system. These fans tune every week and are bombarded with advertising and media messages and spend thousands voting for the favourites. It's become a reality of its own and the people behind it may even be having a little bit of a God complex right about now. The thing to remember is that human creation is imperfect, we sow the seeds of destruction is everything we build or create.
Let's see how long it will be before people realise that reality isn't to be found inside an electronic box, it's what you do with the time you've been given.
Just Me.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
White Collar Blues
I know, I'm massively overdue for a post on the site soon...but the truth of the matter is, I just can't seem to work up the enthusiasm for it. My current jobless situation is beginning to grate on my nerves. I've been telling myself that I've held out for so long and I should hold out for a little longer to finally land the job I want. Still, that line of reasoning is beginning to wear a little thin and more and more I think that instead of looking for the 'right job' I should maybe settle for the 'right now job'. The idea of 'settling' for anything makes me sick to my stomach though. It's taken me a long time to get to where I am right now, and I don't want to settle for anything less than what I want.
Fingers crossed. The perfect job is around the corner. I have faith...for now.
Just Me.
Fingers crossed. The perfect job is around the corner. I have faith...for now.
Just Me.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
The Laptop Saga
Let me tell you about my birthday gift. First off, I don't usually make a big deal about my birthday. I try to pay as little attention to it as I can. There have been years when I try to forget it altogether. This year, what with it being the big 3-0 and me not being where I want to be career wise, I was quite content to simply let this birthday pass on by unnoticed.
My mother has always given me a birthday present and for the last five or six years or so, it has always been jewellery. I was expecting something of the same this year.
Suddenly this year, she decides to give me a laptop. This is the story of that gift.
Now, let me lay the background for this tale. My laptop dies on the service desk sometime in November of last year. Luckily for me, my sister had left her laptop here in July when she went to study in India. So I used her laptop. She came back for her holiday in December and once again refused to take the laptop back. I must say that Shameni's - my sister - laptop, an Acer had a minor problem. The battery would not charge. It was not a problem for me of course as I used the laptop at the desk. Now in the intervening time between January and March, my mother made my sister a promise to get her a new laptop. After waiting an eternity, Shameni decided in March that she wanted a laptop. So I placed an order for a Dell laptop on the Dell website and told my mother about the awesome deal I'd secured which was to run out on the day before my birthday. So, at the last minute on the eve of my birthday, my mom says to me "Go ahead, place an order, for another laptop because that is your birthday present." I was overjoyed. Anyone who has known me in the last few years will know that I am inseparable from my laptop. It is my lifeline and my original idea was to get myself a new laptop once I started a new job. This offer from my mom couldn't have come at a better time. It was too good to be true. Too late I remembered the adage "if it's sounds too good to be true, it is." From this point onwards this essentially simple transaction became a series of almost comedic disasters.
DISASTER 1
Neither my mother nor I have a credit card. I was also unaware at the time of the other methods of payment which were available. So our solution to the problem was to use the credit card of a friend of ours. We pay her the money, she enjoys the bonus points, it was a win/win situation. So armed with Angela's credit card details which were read to me over the phone, I placed the order. However, she had transposed two of the numbers on the card. Dell called her and sorted it out so were at peace. Disaster 1 was averted.
DISASTER 2
When I placed the order for my sister's laptop I asked her to message me a colour preference. The Inspiron 1420 model I was purchasing comes in 8 colours. I never heard from her and I chose a colour that looked alright to me on the site; Flamingo Pink. When I told my sister, she had a minor hissy fit. My mother too chimes in at this point telling me I shoul have orderd the Midnight Blue. I thought the Blue looked drab. This disaster was avereted only because my mother decided to give me a laptop. So while the first laptop was pink, I placed an order for the second laptop which was to be blue. Disaster 2 averted.
DISASTER 3
Dell calls me to tell me that Angela's credit card has exceeded her limit. So I called Angela who was perplexed as the only purchase on the card was the initial laptop, so she calls her bank. The bank tells her that Dell swiped her card twice for the initial purchase. I was livid! I called Dell and yelled. They checked with their finance office and told me that they have only received one payment. So I called Angela and relayed the message and she called her bank. According to her bank, there had been two swiped of the card but only one had been confirmed, leaving the other transaction pending. Instead of doing the simple thing and simply cancelling the second transaction, Alliance, Angela's bank, gave her the approval code and told her to get Dell to cancel the transaction. (Yeah coz' that makes sense! Give the Vendor power over the purchasers credit card.) Anyway Dell calls me back up to say that they can't find the transaction. By this point I'm fed up with this whole three ringed circus. I tell Dell to call Angela and have them sort it out. What do they decide? They blame Citibank which is Dell's bank and the only unrepresented party in this mess. (This is the reason everyone needs a lawyer.) So what solution do they come up with? They cancel the second transaction. I suggested it FIVE phone calls ago...but hey what do I know, I'm only the actual customer! Of course by the time this is decided, it's 6p, pm Friday and Dell doesn't open past office hours or weekends. So Ihave a weekend to wait before I re-order. Disaster 3 averted.
DISASTER 4
Over the course of the weekend, I find out that my sister wants a larger screen on the laptop. The Inspiron 142o that I ordered has a mere 14.1 inch screen. Of course screen size was not even a consideration for me. However, my sister tells me, as she is going to use the laptop primarily as a glorified DVD player, she would have preferred a larger screen. I tell her its a done deal and its too late to change her mind. She quietens down. Disaster 4 averted.
DISASTER 5
My mother overhears the conversation. She asks me what the problem is with the Acer that I was currently using. There was actually nothing wrong with the Acer except that the battery wouldn't charde. It was in fact ideal for my sister as it had a 17.1 inch screen. My mother then comes up with the brilliant idea to have the Acer repaired for my sister and having only one new laptop. I didn't see a problem with that as it meant I wouldn't have to go through the whole drama of re-ordering the second laptop. All this was of course hingeing on my sister's agreement. I leave the business of telling my sister to my mother. She as the one who instigated the whole laptop buying spree and also the one to come up with the laptop repairing idea. This is the moment I was hit with an overwhelming sense of foreboding. Still at this point,I thought fifth disaster averted.
DISASTER 6
My sister arrived the same day as the laptop. My mother has not told my sister that this laptop is in actual fact mine. My sister is overjoyed at 'her' laptop. I am seething away as I wait for my mother to tell my sister. She never does anything. I ask my sister if she would take the Acer if I had it repaired for her; she says "Not now that I have the Dell!" Still my mother says nothing. I am absolutely livid! There isn't a second laptop coming and this laptop supposedly belongs to both of us because my mother is too spineless to stand up to her youngest. Frankly I'm not too upset with my sister either. I mean I am a little annoyed with her wanting the laptop to merely watch movies on but I still can't blame her. She's been quite content to either a) leave the Acer here; or b) have it repaired. I t was my mother that instigated the whole buying a new laptop thing. I was perfectly content to use the Acer and purchase a laptop when I got a job. Again it was my mother who instigated the whole new laptop thing. Finally I decide that I would just stick to my original plan and buy a laptop once I started working. I finally convey this to my mother at as normal a volume as I can manage. It took some doing not to do it with my hands wrapped firmly around her throat. To top it all off this catastrophe, she blithely infoms me that she wasn’t going to get into the middle of this and that I should simply sort it out with my sister. I wanted to scream. She started the whole mess. She stirred us both up with the whole laptop fiasco when the both of us were perfectly content with the way things were. Then, having stirred the pot, messed things up, she calmly steps aside and says ‘I had nothing to do with this.’ Bart Simpson has nothing on my mother. Luckily Shameni saw the wisdom of taking the Acer. Disaster 6 averted.
DISASTER 7
The Acer did not return from the shop in time for my sister’s return to India. So the pink laptop that was initially meant for my sister, ended up with my sister. I write this story with in book with a pen the old fashioned way as I await the return of the Acer. My birthday present turned out to be a massive case of ‘It’s the thought that counts.’ I had a brand new laptop for a full two weeks and really looking back at the chronicle of events surrounding its purchase, I am surprised, no shocked that I was even allowed to hold on to it for as long. There was a catch to this brand new laptop, however. I am an afficianado of Second Life as my previous entries may suggest and this spanking new laptop didn’t support SL. Apparently as spanking new as it was, I didn’t yet have a graphics card that supported the graphics of SL.
Throughout this episode in my life, I finally learned that if something is too good to be true, it usually bloody is, even if the deal comes from your mother.
This is where the story ended when I wrote it in my book. However, things have progressed from then. Since then, the Acer was returned but unrepaired as it turns out that whatever was wrong with it was beyond fixing. Then, despite the fact that when I sent it in for repairs it was working perfectly well, after I picked it up, the keyboard no longer functioned. So back I went to the shop and these guys swore up and down that they didn’t touch the keyboard side of things and that there was no reason why it should suddenly stop working. He tried replacing the keyboard and nada, not a single sign of life.
I was at my wits end, till my father says, that since I was promised a laptop for my birthday I will receive a laptop for my birthday and to go ahead and place the order. He then informs me that I shouldn’t have given the other laptop to Shameni because he never agreed to buy her a new laptop! I don’t know why this even came as a surprise to me...considering the way my mother plays fast and loose with the facts.
So I type this now on a brand new laptop that supports SecondLife and is Ruby Red in colour. This one I know I’ll hang on to for a long time, simply because of all the trials and tribulations that went into obtaining it.
Just Me.
My mother has always given me a birthday present and for the last five or six years or so, it has always been jewellery. I was expecting something of the same this year.
Suddenly this year, she decides to give me a laptop. This is the story of that gift.
Now, let me lay the background for this tale. My laptop dies on the service desk sometime in November of last year. Luckily for me, my sister had left her laptop here in July when she went to study in India. So I used her laptop. She came back for her holiday in December and once again refused to take the laptop back. I must say that Shameni's - my sister - laptop, an Acer had a minor problem. The battery would not charge. It was not a problem for me of course as I used the laptop at the desk. Now in the intervening time between January and March, my mother made my sister a promise to get her a new laptop. After waiting an eternity, Shameni decided in March that she wanted a laptop. So I placed an order for a Dell laptop on the Dell website and told my mother about the awesome deal I'd secured which was to run out on the day before my birthday. So, at the last minute on the eve of my birthday, my mom says to me "Go ahead, place an order, for another laptop because that is your birthday present." I was overjoyed. Anyone who has known me in the last few years will know that I am inseparable from my laptop. It is my lifeline and my original idea was to get myself a new laptop once I started a new job. This offer from my mom couldn't have come at a better time. It was too good to be true. Too late I remembered the adage "if it's sounds too good to be true, it is." From this point onwards this essentially simple transaction became a series of almost comedic disasters.
DISASTER 1
Neither my mother nor I have a credit card. I was also unaware at the time of the other methods of payment which were available. So our solution to the problem was to use the credit card of a friend of ours. We pay her the money, she enjoys the bonus points, it was a win/win situation. So armed with Angela's credit card details which were read to me over the phone, I placed the order. However, she had transposed two of the numbers on the card. Dell called her and sorted it out so were at peace. Disaster 1 was averted.
DISASTER 2
When I placed the order for my sister's laptop I asked her to message me a colour preference. The Inspiron 1420 model I was purchasing comes in 8 colours. I never heard from her and I chose a colour that looked alright to me on the site; Flamingo Pink. When I told my sister, she had a minor hissy fit. My mother too chimes in at this point telling me I shoul have orderd the Midnight Blue. I thought the Blue looked drab. This disaster was avereted only because my mother decided to give me a laptop. So while the first laptop was pink, I placed an order for the second laptop which was to be blue. Disaster 2 averted.
DISASTER 3
Dell calls me to tell me that Angela's credit card has exceeded her limit. So I called Angela who was perplexed as the only purchase on the card was the initial laptop, so she calls her bank. The bank tells her that Dell swiped her card twice for the initial purchase. I was livid! I called Dell and yelled. They checked with their finance office and told me that they have only received one payment. So I called Angela and relayed the message and she called her bank. According to her bank, there had been two swiped of the card but only one had been confirmed, leaving the other transaction pending. Instead of doing the simple thing and simply cancelling the second transaction, Alliance, Angela's bank, gave her the approval code and told her to get Dell to cancel the transaction. (Yeah coz' that makes sense! Give the Vendor power over the purchasers credit card.) Anyway Dell calls me back up to say that they can't find the transaction. By this point I'm fed up with this whole three ringed circus. I tell Dell to call Angela and have them sort it out. What do they decide? They blame Citibank which is Dell's bank and the only unrepresented party in this mess. (This is the reason everyone needs a lawyer.) So what solution do they come up with? They cancel the second transaction. I suggested it FIVE phone calls ago...but hey what do I know, I'm only the actual customer! Of course by the time this is decided, it's 6p, pm Friday and Dell doesn't open past office hours or weekends. So Ihave a weekend to wait before I re-order. Disaster 3 averted.
DISASTER 4
Over the course of the weekend, I find out that my sister wants a larger screen on the laptop. The Inspiron 142o that I ordered has a mere 14.1 inch screen. Of course screen size was not even a consideration for me. However, my sister tells me, as she is going to use the laptop primarily as a glorified DVD player, she would have preferred a larger screen. I tell her its a done deal and its too late to change her mind. She quietens down. Disaster 4 averted.
DISASTER 5
My mother overhears the conversation. She asks me what the problem is with the Acer that I was currently using. There was actually nothing wrong with the Acer except that the battery wouldn't charde. It was in fact ideal for my sister as it had a 17.1 inch screen. My mother then comes up with the brilliant idea to have the Acer repaired for my sister and having only one new laptop. I didn't see a problem with that as it meant I wouldn't have to go through the whole drama of re-ordering the second laptop. All this was of course hingeing on my sister's agreement. I leave the business of telling my sister to my mother. She as the one who instigated the whole laptop buying spree and also the one to come up with the laptop repairing idea. This is the moment I was hit with an overwhelming sense of foreboding. Still at this point,I thought fifth disaster averted.
DISASTER 6
My sister arrived the same day as the laptop. My mother has not told my sister that this laptop is in actual fact mine. My sister is overjoyed at 'her' laptop. I am seething away as I wait for my mother to tell my sister. She never does anything. I ask my sister if she would take the Acer if I had it repaired for her; she says "Not now that I have the Dell!" Still my mother says nothing. I am absolutely livid! There isn't a second laptop coming and this laptop supposedly belongs to both of us because my mother is too spineless to stand up to her youngest. Frankly I'm not too upset with my sister either. I mean I am a little annoyed with her wanting the laptop to merely watch movies on but I still can't blame her. She's been quite content to either a) leave the Acer here; or b) have it repaired. I t was my mother that instigated the whole buying a new laptop thing. I was perfectly content to use the Acer and purchase a laptop when I got a job. Again it was my mother who instigated the whole new laptop thing. Finally I decide that I would just stick to my original plan and buy a laptop once I started working. I finally convey this to my mother at as normal a volume as I can manage. It took some doing not to do it with my hands wrapped firmly around her throat. To top it all off this catastrophe, she blithely infoms me that she wasn’t going to get into the middle of this and that I should simply sort it out with my sister. I wanted to scream. She started the whole mess. She stirred us both up with the whole laptop fiasco when the both of us were perfectly content with the way things were. Then, having stirred the pot, messed things up, she calmly steps aside and says ‘I had nothing to do with this.’ Bart Simpson has nothing on my mother. Luckily Shameni saw the wisdom of taking the Acer. Disaster 6 averted.
DISASTER 7
The Acer did not return from the shop in time for my sister’s return to India. So the pink laptop that was initially meant for my sister, ended up with my sister. I write this story with in book with a pen the old fashioned way as I await the return of the Acer. My birthday present turned out to be a massive case of ‘It’s the thought that counts.’ I had a brand new laptop for a full two weeks and really looking back at the chronicle of events surrounding its purchase, I am surprised, no shocked that I was even allowed to hold on to it for as long. There was a catch to this brand new laptop, however. I am an afficianado of Second Life as my previous entries may suggest and this spanking new laptop didn’t support SL. Apparently as spanking new as it was, I didn’t yet have a graphics card that supported the graphics of SL.
Throughout this episode in my life, I finally learned that if something is too good to be true, it usually bloody is, even if the deal comes from your mother.
This is where the story ended when I wrote it in my book. However, things have progressed from then. Since then, the Acer was returned but unrepaired as it turns out that whatever was wrong with it was beyond fixing. Then, despite the fact that when I sent it in for repairs it was working perfectly well, after I picked it up, the keyboard no longer functioned. So back I went to the shop and these guys swore up and down that they didn’t touch the keyboard side of things and that there was no reason why it should suddenly stop working. He tried replacing the keyboard and nada, not a single sign of life.
I was at my wits end, till my father says, that since I was promised a laptop for my birthday I will receive a laptop for my birthday and to go ahead and place the order. He then informs me that I shouldn’t have given the other laptop to Shameni because he never agreed to buy her a new laptop! I don’t know why this even came as a surprise to me...considering the way my mother plays fast and loose with the facts.
So I type this now on a brand new laptop that supports SecondLife and is Ruby Red in colour. This one I know I’ll hang on to for a long time, simply because of all the trials and tribulations that went into obtaining it.
Just Me.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Supernatural Season Three - Jus In Bello episode review
Damn this episode had so many issues. I don’t even know where to begin.
The FBI agent who has spent three years tracking alleged serial killers, who finds out that there are worst things out there in the dark.
The hunters who are faced with a moral crisis. The traitor who offers to sacrifice herself. The innocent who offers to die to save her friends. The final foolhardy plan that works for a little while only to ultimately cost more lives.
It was gratifying for me to see Agent Henriksen finally on the side of the Winchester boys. It was nice to rub his face in it a little bit. Demons do exist. They possess people and make them do bad things. Henriksen found out the hard way that the Winchesters are actually the good guys in all of this. I suppose it must have been difficult for him to find out that for years he’s been on the trail of the wrong people. If he’d had a moment to think about it, it probably would have upset him that he ultimately led the demons to this little town. Fortunately for him, he barely had that minute to himself.
I’ve got to hand it to the demons, they move really quickly. I mean seriously, it’s something the Armed Forces need to learn. Still, haste makes waste and the demons really have nothing to lose after all. It’s not their bodies they are bringing to bear, it’s not their lives that are in danger.
The boys were faced with some heavy questions in this episode and Sam who is pretty heavily tested, fails it – rather spectacularly in my opinion. I suppose it is the age old question, does the good of the many outweigh the good of the few? Should we end one life today if we could save a hundred lives tomorrow? It’s a heavy question and one which many have tried answering for ages.
In my opinion approaching things in this manner is really just wrong; if you’re talking about life and death. We’re not talking about taxes or levies or tolls or any other material detriment which this adage actually applies to. The question of life and death is not one which can be quantified. It is impossible. In the episode, Ruby says the death of the one person, the virgin, is preferable to the death of the thirty odd people that may possibly die otherwise. That sounds like a logical statement until you start dissecting it. Nancy is an innocent. She was quite willing to lay her life down for her friends which is an issue I will get to later but there is still no way of saying her life is worth less than the thirty. What if it had been thirty homeless people? Or thirty criminals? Would the answer change then? What if it was a question of one person dying so five could live? We could use the Winchesters, Dean’s life for Sam’s. What if five people had to die instead? Would that be too much of a price to pay? This is still just a question of numbers. We haven’t even started thinking about the emotion factor. I mean what if, the one sacrifice was the life of someone who would go on to cure cancer? What if five human sacrifices were needed to save this one person? What if that person were your brother, or your father or your lover? Would the odds change then?
Ultimately, I think that Dean’s solution was the best in the circumstances. It stood a small chance of winning but at least everyone of them would have gone out fighting. If there is a God in all of this, maybe, that will count for something with him. At the end of the day, unless you’re God and you have in front of you the big picture, you can only act in accordance to your internal compass. Sure Ruby’s plan made sense in a sickly logical way but they would have paid the ultimate price. The price was not the death of that girl, it would have been their humanity. If they had won the battle but lost their humanity, they would have ultimately lost the war. If this is to be a fight between good and evil, then evil must be held at bay. Cold logic cannot hold the reins, for logic can rationalize anything. The slaughter of 6 million Jews may seem heartless and inhumane, but surely somewhere, it was the logical thing to do. When you start looking at the bottom line, the moment you keep your eyes fixed on the horizon, you lose sight of those around you; you stop looking at the individual you’ve just trampled over to reach your goal. The end does not justify the means. It never has. If you have your eyes fixed on the horizon, you will never be able to see any alternative routes to your goal. Sometimes, it’s not about getting there the quickest, sometimes it’s just about getting there. I don’t blame Ruby, she barely remembers her humanity, Sam’s hesitation is unforgivable. Sam is not a soldier. He is not a leader. The more I watch Supernatural, the more I think that Sam is overrated. His intelligence, his drive, his skill, his strength, none of it qualifies him to lead an army, demon or otherwise. For all his experience and intelligence, he lacks wisdom. For all his self-righteous, holier than thou ways, he lacks a true moral compass.
My rather long winded ranting about the morality of the decisions made in this episode may lead people to think that I’m some kind of sentimentalist. That is not the case. I am quite prepared to allow harsh action on the mere suggestion of threat as was the case in Croatoan between Duane and Dean. I admit Dean could have waited a little longer but still had I been in Dean’s shoes, I would have shot Duane had I the chance, Sammy’s opinion be damned.
I am also quite prepared to allow people the opportunity and the right to sacrifice themselves. It is the best quality in us all. Ruby was willing to sacrifice herself for Sam and Dean, which as a measure of devotion says an awful lot about her. Nancy was willing to sacrifice herself for her friends. No one wants to die; it isn’t a question of having a death wish, it is instead the hope of a meaningful death. It is a deep seated biological drive to ensure the propagation of the species, it is the very quality that makes us human. Yeah I know, I’ve just agreed with both sides of the argument but that’s why I write this blog, in that hopes that my thoughts sound less insane if they are aired. A very slim hope if this entry is anything to go by.
On a lighter note, it’s a shame that Henriksen was killed, because the Winchesters having someone in the FBI would have been sweet. Plus, I think Henriksen was all set to give up his day job and become supernatural hunter extraordinaire. It is also a shame because I think him and Dean would have become good friends.
Ah well c’est la vie.
Just Me.
The FBI agent who has spent three years tracking alleged serial killers, who finds out that there are worst things out there in the dark.
The hunters who are faced with a moral crisis. The traitor who offers to sacrifice herself. The innocent who offers to die to save her friends. The final foolhardy plan that works for a little while only to ultimately cost more lives.
It was gratifying for me to see Agent Henriksen finally on the side of the Winchester boys. It was nice to rub his face in it a little bit. Demons do exist. They possess people and make them do bad things. Henriksen found out the hard way that the Winchesters are actually the good guys in all of this. I suppose it must have been difficult for him to find out that for years he’s been on the trail of the wrong people. If he’d had a moment to think about it, it probably would have upset him that he ultimately led the demons to this little town. Fortunately for him, he barely had that minute to himself.
I’ve got to hand it to the demons, they move really quickly. I mean seriously, it’s something the Armed Forces need to learn. Still, haste makes waste and the demons really have nothing to lose after all. It’s not their bodies they are bringing to bear, it’s not their lives that are in danger.
The boys were faced with some heavy questions in this episode and Sam who is pretty heavily tested, fails it – rather spectacularly in my opinion. I suppose it is the age old question, does the good of the many outweigh the good of the few? Should we end one life today if we could save a hundred lives tomorrow? It’s a heavy question and one which many have tried answering for ages.
In my opinion approaching things in this manner is really just wrong; if you’re talking about life and death. We’re not talking about taxes or levies or tolls or any other material detriment which this adage actually applies to. The question of life and death is not one which can be quantified. It is impossible. In the episode, Ruby says the death of the one person, the virgin, is preferable to the death of the thirty odd people that may possibly die otherwise. That sounds like a logical statement until you start dissecting it. Nancy is an innocent. She was quite willing to lay her life down for her friends which is an issue I will get to later but there is still no way of saying her life is worth less than the thirty. What if it had been thirty homeless people? Or thirty criminals? Would the answer change then? What if it was a question of one person dying so five could live? We could use the Winchesters, Dean’s life for Sam’s. What if five people had to die instead? Would that be too much of a price to pay? This is still just a question of numbers. We haven’t even started thinking about the emotion factor. I mean what if, the one sacrifice was the life of someone who would go on to cure cancer? What if five human sacrifices were needed to save this one person? What if that person were your brother, or your father or your lover? Would the odds change then?
Ultimately, I think that Dean’s solution was the best in the circumstances. It stood a small chance of winning but at least everyone of them would have gone out fighting. If there is a God in all of this, maybe, that will count for something with him. At the end of the day, unless you’re God and you have in front of you the big picture, you can only act in accordance to your internal compass. Sure Ruby’s plan made sense in a sickly logical way but they would have paid the ultimate price. The price was not the death of that girl, it would have been their humanity. If they had won the battle but lost their humanity, they would have ultimately lost the war. If this is to be a fight between good and evil, then evil must be held at bay. Cold logic cannot hold the reins, for logic can rationalize anything. The slaughter of 6 million Jews may seem heartless and inhumane, but surely somewhere, it was the logical thing to do. When you start looking at the bottom line, the moment you keep your eyes fixed on the horizon, you lose sight of those around you; you stop looking at the individual you’ve just trampled over to reach your goal. The end does not justify the means. It never has. If you have your eyes fixed on the horizon, you will never be able to see any alternative routes to your goal. Sometimes, it’s not about getting there the quickest, sometimes it’s just about getting there. I don’t blame Ruby, she barely remembers her humanity, Sam’s hesitation is unforgivable. Sam is not a soldier. He is not a leader. The more I watch Supernatural, the more I think that Sam is overrated. His intelligence, his drive, his skill, his strength, none of it qualifies him to lead an army, demon or otherwise. For all his experience and intelligence, he lacks wisdom. For all his self-righteous, holier than thou ways, he lacks a true moral compass.
My rather long winded ranting about the morality of the decisions made in this episode may lead people to think that I’m some kind of sentimentalist. That is not the case. I am quite prepared to allow harsh action on the mere suggestion of threat as was the case in Croatoan between Duane and Dean. I admit Dean could have waited a little longer but still had I been in Dean’s shoes, I would have shot Duane had I the chance, Sammy’s opinion be damned.
I am also quite prepared to allow people the opportunity and the right to sacrifice themselves. It is the best quality in us all. Ruby was willing to sacrifice herself for Sam and Dean, which as a measure of devotion says an awful lot about her. Nancy was willing to sacrifice herself for her friends. No one wants to die; it isn’t a question of having a death wish, it is instead the hope of a meaningful death. It is a deep seated biological drive to ensure the propagation of the species, it is the very quality that makes us human. Yeah I know, I’ve just agreed with both sides of the argument but that’s why I write this blog, in that hopes that my thoughts sound less insane if they are aired. A very slim hope if this entry is anything to go by.
On a lighter note, it’s a shame that Henriksen was killed, because the Winchesters having someone in the FBI would have been sweet. Plus, I think Henriksen was all set to give up his day job and become supernatural hunter extraordinaire. It is also a shame because I think him and Dean would have become good friends.
Ah well c’est la vie.
Just Me.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
The Ultimate Escape
I have discovered the ultimate in escapism. Truth be told, it wasn't a recent discovery. I heard about it on CSI: NY one of the few series that I avidly follow. What is this new form of escapism you ask? Well it's called Second Life. It's a virtual world within the world wide web and it's absolutely free to become a member of. From the moment you sign up, it draws you in and before you know it, you're addicted and spending all your waking moments at your computer 'inworld'.
The moment you join Second Life, you get to choose an Avatar...or a template of one. Once you go 'inworld' your first stop is Help Island where you are shown how to work the controls on your avatar. Once you've mastered this, then the world is your oyster. There is nothing that is beyond the limits of your avatar. You are limited only by time, money and imagination. I've been a member now for a couple of weeks and my time has been taken up in altering the shape of the avatar template so that it now looks exactly like I want it to look.
Of course, this being me, the experience wouldn't be complete without some weird complication. It came in the form of my disappearing clothes. Oddly enough, this is a complication rarely faced by anyone in SecondLife and one the Support Techs were baffled by. I had gotten the avatar to look the way I wanted it to and my friend had guided me to a couple of places that were giving away free clothes (which is a common occurrence). I was all dressed to the nines and about to go exploring inworld when suddenly, I realised that the top of my dress had disappeared! Thankfully, I was alone when this happened. When you move your avatar, the view angle is from the back of the avatar and so all I saw was the back of my avatar and as she was wearing a backless dress I was nary the wiser until I accidentally used the camera controls and rotated the view! Imagine my shock when there I was topless with my intimate bits hanging out. It's rather an embarassing circumstance I can tell you. I mean having spent so much time and effort into getting my avatar to look exactly right, it was almost like it was happening to me.
I turned to my friend for help and she in turn, asked her friends for assistance. You know that scene from 'Friends'? The one where Ross has a growth of some kind on his butt and he goes to the doctor and the doctor holds a convention over Ross' ass? I have now experienced it in virtual reality. Ross, my man...I feel for you dude!
Anyway, after a lot of trial and error, it turns out that my laptop was the culprit of the whole fiasco and we've got it fixed to some extent...but I'm now insanely phobic about going out in public! I've been sorting out my inventory for the past week and that has been my excuse...but soon that chore will be done and I will have to venture out into virtual world. I mean it would be a crime if I kept this beauty from 'inworld'.
Funny how now I need to escape from my escapism. Ah life....
Just me.
Saturday, February 02, 2008
The Power of Attraction
We have all heard about the power of positive thinking. It is one of the most talked about 'secret' to success. Yet, despite the hype and the talk, few people believe in it. Optimists are deemed dreamers. What is it about human nature that makes us believe the worst about any situation? Why is it that in any event, we gravitate towards the darker side of things? Are we at our very core, evil?
I believe that those who call themselves realists are in fact merely lazy. It is easier to believe the worst. It is because there a ready examples of the worst of things. No one talks about successes the same way they do failures. Misfortune draws a bigger audience than happiness. We've come to believe - especially in this century - that happiness and joy are weak emotions, one that only idealists with their head in the clouds strive for.
Especially in Asia too much emphasis has been placed on duty. The conventional wisdom is if you shoulder your duty and carry it out with honour, happiness should not matter. Happiness has become a pariah in the spectrum of emotions allowed of mankind.
This conventional wisdom must change. Happiness is the only point of life. We are put on this earth and given one life to live. If we do not achieve happiness in this lifetime, we have failed and merely existed. Existence without happiness is not an achievement, it is that which is accomplished by animals and plants. A lowly blade of grass achieves existence...it is happiness that sets us apart, it is happiness and conversely unhappiness that makes us human.
You receive what you ask for and you achieve what you expect to achieve. If that is the case, there is no harm in asking for peace, joy and contentment. It would be a crime to expect to achieve less than perfect happiness. That is the power of positive thinking. This is not the weaker emotion. To carry the positive thought and hold on to it in the face of all this resistance, that is true strength. If you can do that, it is quite possible to do anything.
Just Me.
I believe that those who call themselves realists are in fact merely lazy. It is easier to believe the worst. It is because there a ready examples of the worst of things. No one talks about successes the same way they do failures. Misfortune draws a bigger audience than happiness. We've come to believe - especially in this century - that happiness and joy are weak emotions, one that only idealists with their head in the clouds strive for.
Especially in Asia too much emphasis has been placed on duty. The conventional wisdom is if you shoulder your duty and carry it out with honour, happiness should not matter. Happiness has become a pariah in the spectrum of emotions allowed of mankind.
This conventional wisdom must change. Happiness is the only point of life. We are put on this earth and given one life to live. If we do not achieve happiness in this lifetime, we have failed and merely existed. Existence without happiness is not an achievement, it is that which is accomplished by animals and plants. A lowly blade of grass achieves existence...it is happiness that sets us apart, it is happiness and conversely unhappiness that makes us human.
You receive what you ask for and you achieve what you expect to achieve. If that is the case, there is no harm in asking for peace, joy and contentment. It would be a crime to expect to achieve less than perfect happiness. That is the power of positive thinking. This is not the weaker emotion. To carry the positive thought and hold on to it in the face of all this resistance, that is true strength. If you can do that, it is quite possible to do anything.
Just Me.
Friday, January 11, 2008
It's the new year!
Well it's here. It's the new year. It's the time of year when most people either look back on the last year and make plans for the future. It's something about this time of year that makes people hopeful like nothing else can. Most people are optimistic at the start of a new year and make resolutions left and right. Parties are hatched to celebrate the end of a year, when in actual fact it is just another day.
Life goes on, nothing actually changes, but come December, inexplicably, there's this feeling that things are coming to an end and that in January, things are going to begin again anew. The truth is, it doesn't. The problems you had in December will still be there in January, the friends are the same, the family is the same, the work is the same...nothing changes, we just want it to.
The saddest thing about the new year, is the attitude of optimism that envelops you, the resolve and the sheer confidence that this year, things will be different, that you will be different. It's energizing and invigorating and it fades in a couple of weeks.
I know I know, that sounds negative and jaded, but it's true. The excitement that comes with the New Year fades over time. For some people, that buzz ends with a hangover from the New Year party, for others, its the slow grind of everyday life that takes its toll. Whatever the reason, it's over.
Am I immune to the excitement and hype of new year? No. Do I have a solution to this cycle of optimism and guilt? Maybe. See I refuse to fall into this trap of planning for the future and resolving to change myself and my environment. I don't know what tomorrow brings, no one does. Why the hell run around trying to plan for a future that may never come.
I am going to be as happy with myself as I can possibly be. The old saying comes to mind that possibly encapsulates my plan.
Take care of today and tomorrow will take care of itself.
I'm gonna try it.
Just me.
Life goes on, nothing actually changes, but come December, inexplicably, there's this feeling that things are coming to an end and that in January, things are going to begin again anew. The truth is, it doesn't. The problems you had in December will still be there in January, the friends are the same, the family is the same, the work is the same...nothing changes, we just want it to.
The saddest thing about the new year, is the attitude of optimism that envelops you, the resolve and the sheer confidence that this year, things will be different, that you will be different. It's energizing and invigorating and it fades in a couple of weeks.
I know I know, that sounds negative and jaded, but it's true. The excitement that comes with the New Year fades over time. For some people, that buzz ends with a hangover from the New Year party, for others, its the slow grind of everyday life that takes its toll. Whatever the reason, it's over.
Am I immune to the excitement and hype of new year? No. Do I have a solution to this cycle of optimism and guilt? Maybe. See I refuse to fall into this trap of planning for the future and resolving to change myself and my environment. I don't know what tomorrow brings, no one does. Why the hell run around trying to plan for a future that may never come.
I am going to be as happy with myself as I can possibly be. The old saying comes to mind that possibly encapsulates my plan.
Take care of today and tomorrow will take care of itself.
I'm gonna try it.
Just me.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Happy Holidays
Yes, yes I know I said Iwould post every week and I actually haven't. I'll make up for my oversight but this brief post is simply to say Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I haven't called or emailed or written anyone for these holidays but rest assured people, the cards are in the mail.
Just Me.
Just Me.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Hypocrisy
Hypocrisy. If there is one thing that I hate, it is hypocrisy. I have recently had to deal with more than my fair share of hypocrisy. There was a wedding in the family recently and somehow I find that it is ocassions such as these that bring out the worst in people.
The mother of the bride, has in my opinion reached such an pinacle of hypocrisy that, I wonder sometimes if she sees two images of herself reflected in the mirror. Not since Tommy Lee Jones portrayal of Batman's nemesis 'Two-Face' have I ever seen such mind boggling double-dealing. A minute with her and she would have you believing she is the reincarnation of Mother Theresa and the victim of malicious scheming the likes of which Joan of Arc had never faced.
The truth is, I've learnt to keep a civil tongue nowadays. Five years ago, most of her raving would have earned her a sharp tongued put down while some of her more venomous remark may even have earned a slap in the face. As it was I let her remarks slide and seethed over it instead. So here's my question. Does that make me a hypocrite?
Just Me.
The mother of the bride, has in my opinion reached such an pinacle of hypocrisy that, I wonder sometimes if she sees two images of herself reflected in the mirror. Not since Tommy Lee Jones portrayal of Batman's nemesis 'Two-Face' have I ever seen such mind boggling double-dealing. A minute with her and she would have you believing she is the reincarnation of Mother Theresa and the victim of malicious scheming the likes of which Joan of Arc had never faced.
The truth is, I've learnt to keep a civil tongue nowadays. Five years ago, most of her raving would have earned her a sharp tongued put down while some of her more venomous remark may even have earned a slap in the face. As it was I let her remarks slide and seethed over it instead. So here's my question. Does that make me a hypocrite?
Just Me.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Promise
Ok I have come to a conclusion. I have concluded that I am the world's worst blogger bar none. I started this blog as an outlet for my creative talent. Or as a constructive outlet for all the pent up anger/depression/joy inside me. Basically it was a place I could write down my thoughts, unedited, as it were and let it go. Looking back, I haven't done that. I've been too afraid to showcase any creative work for fear of harsh criticism and too secretive to share my thoughts on anything. I've been my own worst critic and harshest censor and in the end I've only myself to blame.
This ends today. I will post a new entry at least once a week. I am not going to second guess myself and I will not censor my thoughts or emotions or hamper my creativity. Besides, if getting my thoughts out here into cyberspace helps even one person or at the very least stops my head from exploding, it will have done some good.
Just me.
This ends today. I will post a new entry at least once a week. I am not going to second guess myself and I will not censor my thoughts or emotions or hamper my creativity. Besides, if getting my thoughts out here into cyberspace helps even one person or at the very least stops my head from exploding, it will have done some good.
Just me.
Saturday, November 04, 2006
I was recently accused of being a non-romantic. Do I agree with that accusation? I suppose I must agree. I don't think of this as a drawback. I mean I appreciate a romantic gesture as much as the next person. I like gifts that indicate the giver has put great thought into it. I just think that nowadays people are completely confused as to what is indicative of romance.
Take for instance the classic story "The gift of the Magi." You know the one, where the guy sells his valuable watch to get a beautiful hair comb for his wife's lovely hair. Meanwhile, the wife sells her hair to get him a chain for the watch. Aww...what rubbish! I mean seriously, this is supposed to be romantic? How is this romantic? How is it romantic that he has a chain for a watch he no longer owns and she has a comb for hair she no longer has! It's a lose/lose situation. I mean if they'd talked to each other, they could have pooled their money and bought a decent bed or a proper meal or something. Practical...definitely, but you can't tell me that it isn't romantic. I mean something they've both worked for and something they can both enjoy together? That's got to be more romantic than the original version.
So yes I am not a bleeding heart romantic but I think that's a good thing. There are too many bloody bleeding heart sentimentalists out there who put value to the most ludicrous things. Valentine has been turned into a three ringed circus! Where is the love, today it's all about who got the biggest bouquet and the most expensive gift. I wish people would start using their heads just a little bit. I mean for crying out loud, the grey stuff between your ears? It's not just there as stuffing you know!
Just me.
Take for instance the classic story "The gift of the Magi." You know the one, where the guy sells his valuable watch to get a beautiful hair comb for his wife's lovely hair. Meanwhile, the wife sells her hair to get him a chain for the watch. Aww...what rubbish! I mean seriously, this is supposed to be romantic? How is this romantic? How is it romantic that he has a chain for a watch he no longer owns and she has a comb for hair she no longer has! It's a lose/lose situation. I mean if they'd talked to each other, they could have pooled their money and bought a decent bed or a proper meal or something. Practical...definitely, but you can't tell me that it isn't romantic. I mean something they've both worked for and something they can both enjoy together? That's got to be more romantic than the original version.
So yes I am not a bleeding heart romantic but I think that's a good thing. There are too many bloody bleeding heart sentimentalists out there who put value to the most ludicrous things. Valentine has been turned into a three ringed circus! Where is the love, today it's all about who got the biggest bouquet and the most expensive gift. I wish people would start using their heads just a little bit. I mean for crying out loud, the grey stuff between your ears? It's not just there as stuffing you know!
Just me.
Friday, September 30, 2005
I've been tagged
Ok, I haven't really been tagged but I thought this was as good a way as any of updating my blog. So here goes.
7 things I plan to do before I die.
1. Lose weight. Those of you who know me...well enough said.
2. Get a tattoo. This will only happen of course, if I have lost weight, and if my skin doesn't react violently to the ink which could bloody happen.
3. Write a novel. I really want to do this, but I haven't been struck by inspiration as yet. I have no topic to write on. I want to write something other than mindless romantic crap although (and I say this very sadly) I've been told that I do fluff and angst and porn extremely well.
4. Go on a cruise around the world. I've traveled quite a bit but this is one thing that I have yet to do.
5. Go on one of those flights that simulate zero gravity. I would love to actually go to space but let's be realistic here.
6. Visit a hydrosphere. What? If I go up I have to come down...all the way down don't ya think?
7. Be this really ultra famous barrister. Hopefully this will happen.
7 I could do.
1. Get through my fucking resits!
2. Achieve a good grade on my LLM.
3. Get a pupillage with a reputable firm for next year.
4. Get an internship with the ECJ or the ICJ.
5. Learn French.
6. Learn German.
7. Learn Spanish.
7 Celebrity Crushes
1. Gary Dourdan
2. George Eads
3. Vin Diesel
4. Will Smith
5. Hugh Jackman/Ryan Reynolds (Hey I've got a list of hundreds...you're lucky I narrowed it down to seven.)
6. Orlando Bloom
7. Angelina Jolie
7 Often Repeated Words
1. Fuck
2. Shit/Shite
3. Bloody
4. Bugger
5. Goddamned
6. Hell
7. Damn
Oh bloody hell I swear a lot! Oops I did it again! Let's just quit now while I'm ahead.
7 Physical Traits That I Look For In The Opposite Sex
1. Tall. (6 feet at least) What can I say I have a thing for tall men.
2. They've got to be built. I don't mean this in a six pack kind of way but they cannot be skinny. I mean I draw the line at any one who's wiry and lanky and skin and bones. I would prefer that my men do not look like they're refugees from Ethiopia.
3. Broad shouldered. The kind you can grab on to. The sort that make you feel like you can rest your burdens on them for a bit and they won't collapse.
4. Nice ass. Enough said.
5. Long legs. Goes hand in hand with the tall bit I suppose.
6. Big Hands. Not for those reasons you perverts! Get your minds out of the gutter. I just like the fact that if they have big hands, mine will look small in comparison.
7. Nice voice. Think Vin Diesel here, kinda smoky, kinda gravelly, all deep!
Having said all that. These are not the things I actually look for in a man. I mean come on. Physical traits? Guys with the physical traits you want are a dime a dozen. What I really look for in a man are the following:
1. Someone who I can talk to. He doesn't necessarily have to agree with my point of view but he would be willing to listen and at least have cogent and relevant arguments as to why he doesn't agree with me.
2. Someone who understands me. I don't want a mind reader but someone who will give me the benefit of the doubt when I do something that he doesn't actually like. I don't verbalise my needs very well so I need somebody who will be able to understand me and maybe provide me with some comfort.
3. Someone who is honest. This is non-negotiable.
4. Someone who is trustworthy. Something else that is non-negotiable.
5. Someone who is hardworking and intelligent. I do not tolerate fools. I don't want Einstein but I do insist that the person has general knowledge, is semi well read, has a viewpoint on something other than bloody football.
6. Someone who is strong. I have a very strong personality and I need someone who is strong enough to stand up to me without trying to control me. I don't want someone overbearing but I need someone who I don't have to worry about using as a doormat.
7. Someone who is dependable. I need someone who I can depend on. This has to be someone who I can share things with. I need someone whom I can trust to get things done. Someone who will share my burdens and not be overwhelmed. I'll give as good as I've got but the whole point of a life partner is someone who will go fifty-fifty on everything. The ups, the downs, the problems and the solutions.
7 People I Can Tag
Well any of the like 5 people who actually read this blog.
I hope you've enjoyed this read.
Just Me.
7 things I plan to do before I die.
1. Lose weight. Those of you who know me...well enough said.
2. Get a tattoo. This will only happen of course, if I have lost weight, and if my skin doesn't react violently to the ink which could bloody happen.
3. Write a novel. I really want to do this, but I haven't been struck by inspiration as yet. I have no topic to write on. I want to write something other than mindless romantic crap although (and I say this very sadly) I've been told that I do fluff and angst and porn extremely well.
4. Go on a cruise around the world. I've traveled quite a bit but this is one thing that I have yet to do.
5. Go on one of those flights that simulate zero gravity. I would love to actually go to space but let's be realistic here.
6. Visit a hydrosphere. What? If I go up I have to come down...all the way down don't ya think?
7. Be this really ultra famous barrister. Hopefully this will happen.
7 I could do.
1. Get through my fucking resits!
2. Achieve a good grade on my LLM.
3. Get a pupillage with a reputable firm for next year.
4. Get an internship with the ECJ or the ICJ.
5. Learn French.
6. Learn German.
7. Learn Spanish.
7 Celebrity Crushes
1. Gary Dourdan
2. George Eads
3. Vin Diesel
4. Will Smith
5. Hugh Jackman/Ryan Reynolds (Hey I've got a list of hundreds...you're lucky I narrowed it down to seven.)
6. Orlando Bloom
7. Angelina Jolie
7 Often Repeated Words
1. Fuck
2. Shit/Shite
3. Bloody
4. Bugger
5. Goddamned
6. Hell
7. Damn
Oh bloody hell I swear a lot! Oops I did it again! Let's just quit now while I'm ahead.
7 Physical Traits That I Look For In The Opposite Sex
1. Tall. (6 feet at least) What can I say I have a thing for tall men.
2. They've got to be built. I don't mean this in a six pack kind of way but they cannot be skinny. I mean I draw the line at any one who's wiry and lanky and skin and bones. I would prefer that my men do not look like they're refugees from Ethiopia.
3. Broad shouldered. The kind you can grab on to. The sort that make you feel like you can rest your burdens on them for a bit and they won't collapse.
4. Nice ass. Enough said.
5. Long legs. Goes hand in hand with the tall bit I suppose.
6. Big Hands. Not for those reasons you perverts! Get your minds out of the gutter. I just like the fact that if they have big hands, mine will look small in comparison.
7. Nice voice. Think Vin Diesel here, kinda smoky, kinda gravelly, all deep!
Having said all that. These are not the things I actually look for in a man. I mean come on. Physical traits? Guys with the physical traits you want are a dime a dozen. What I really look for in a man are the following:
1. Someone who I can talk to. He doesn't necessarily have to agree with my point of view but he would be willing to listen and at least have cogent and relevant arguments as to why he doesn't agree with me.
2. Someone who understands me. I don't want a mind reader but someone who will give me the benefit of the doubt when I do something that he doesn't actually like. I don't verbalise my needs very well so I need somebody who will be able to understand me and maybe provide me with some comfort.
3. Someone who is honest. This is non-negotiable.
4. Someone who is trustworthy. Something else that is non-negotiable.
5. Someone who is hardworking and intelligent. I do not tolerate fools. I don't want Einstein but I do insist that the person has general knowledge, is semi well read, has a viewpoint on something other than bloody football.
6. Someone who is strong. I have a very strong personality and I need someone who is strong enough to stand up to me without trying to control me. I don't want someone overbearing but I need someone who I don't have to worry about using as a doormat.
7. Someone who is dependable. I need someone who I can depend on. This has to be someone who I can share things with. I need someone whom I can trust to get things done. Someone who will share my burdens and not be overwhelmed. I'll give as good as I've got but the whole point of a life partner is someone who will go fifty-fifty on everything. The ups, the downs, the problems and the solutions.
7 People I Can Tag
Well any of the like 5 people who actually read this blog.
I hope you've enjoyed this read.
Just Me.
Monday, June 06, 2005
Why?
I wish that someone could live my life for me. People make things seem so easy. I don’t know. I just seem to screw things up all the time. And I don’t even know why I do the things I do sometimes. I mean my problems usually come down to one thing. I failed to act at a time when I should have. And why didn’t I act? Usually because I’m too lazy to do it. I am not a lazy person by nature. I mean I put in so much effort in so many areas, just ask anyone. I will give my life’s blood to help out a friend in need. I will go out of my way to do the research for a friend’s project. So why the hell can’t I sort out my own things?
Even in the midst of crushing defeat I am more concerned about the outcome of a friend’s exam or hardships. I don’t care what happens to me. No that’s not exactly true. I do care. I just hope that I will come through it without any substantial scarring. I know that it doesn’t happen. More often than not, my friend’s get through their troubles with next to no help from me and I’m still stuck with my disasters. So what do I do? Why do I do the things that I do?
I wish I could wipe out my whole life and start over. Still there’s a niggling doubt at the back of my head that says even if I did that I would end up in exactly the same position I am in now.
Somebody just shoot me and get it over with. I’m doing no one any good being here and I’m certainly not doing myself any good.
Even in the midst of crushing defeat I am more concerned about the outcome of a friend’s exam or hardships. I don’t care what happens to me. No that’s not exactly true. I do care. I just hope that I will come through it without any substantial scarring. I know that it doesn’t happen. More often than not, my friend’s get through their troubles with next to no help from me and I’m still stuck with my disasters. So what do I do? Why do I do the things that I do?
I wish I could wipe out my whole life and start over. Still there’s a niggling doubt at the back of my head that says even if I did that I would end up in exactly the same position I am in now.
Somebody just shoot me and get it over with. I’m doing no one any good being here and I’m certainly not doing myself any good.
Thursday, December 23, 2004
The Trojan War. It was meant to be the greatest war the world has ever known. Yet what was the point of it all? The folly of one man. The pride of another. The quest for glory, world domination, greed. Thousands of years ago, this war was fought. Men died, cities burned, history was made they say. Yet what have we gained from this great war? Nothing! There is nothing to be gained by war. Only death and destruction. There is no glory in death, there is only death! Death is the end of the journey. It is final as nothing else in this world.
What have men learned from the mistakes of the past? Nothing! It would seem that we are impervious to such lessons. Each generation goes on, vowing never to repeat the mistakes of the past, yet again and again we do. The Trojan War. The World Wars. The Vietnam War. The Sino-Japanese War. The war in Kashmir. The war in Israel. The Gulf War. The war against Terror. Men died in these wars, believing they were fighting to make the world a better place. The truth is, war breeds war. The victor on the field today will be the dead on the field tomorrow. Everyone dies. A soldier believes it is better to die in honour and glory than to die like a coward, old and toothless in bed. Yet it is death that is the ultimate victor. There is no sense in war. There is no sense in fighting. There is no sense in violence. There is only anger and hatred and pain. Ultimately there is death.
Can all the wrongs in the world be righted by the blood of innocents? Can it be put to right by the blood of the damned? Will the sins of this generation end if all the blood of the wrongdoers is spilt today? Or will we go on to make the same mistakes? Will we blindly follow the paths that seem so different to us, yet that lead us to the same end?
It seems that this is inevitable. Men are creatures of bloodshed and death. We are mortal, our lives brief. Yet we choose to throw it all away in the pursuit of glory, of honour, of happiness. We plant the seeds of our destructions in the fields of our success. Men are creatures who look at the future and therein lies our failure. Therein lies our weakness. Like the prophetess Cassandra who always predicted the future but was never believed, history cries out its warnings. Those warnings fall on deaf ears. Pleadings that drop like stones into the bottomless pools of ignorance.
We believe that we are invincible. We believe that we are smarter than our forefathers. We are not. We have technology that our ancestors did not, yet the same weakness runs in our veins. The same bloodlust. We have come a long way from the time of Achilles and Hector. Yet today a thousand Hectors and a thousand Achilles’ fight on and die on battlefields, uncounted, unsung, fallen heroes for whom there will be no tomorrow. For what did they give their lives? For whom did they shed their blood? Will it comfort their loved ones, now that they are dead and gone that they fought for honour? For glory? For what they believed was right.
Men say they fight because the other man does. The beginning has to come somewhere. Someone will have to stand up and say “I have seen the folly of our ways. It must end. Let it start with me.”
Just Me.
What have men learned from the mistakes of the past? Nothing! It would seem that we are impervious to such lessons. Each generation goes on, vowing never to repeat the mistakes of the past, yet again and again we do. The Trojan War. The World Wars. The Vietnam War. The Sino-Japanese War. The war in Kashmir. The war in Israel. The Gulf War. The war against Terror. Men died in these wars, believing they were fighting to make the world a better place. The truth is, war breeds war. The victor on the field today will be the dead on the field tomorrow. Everyone dies. A soldier believes it is better to die in honour and glory than to die like a coward, old and toothless in bed. Yet it is death that is the ultimate victor. There is no sense in war. There is no sense in fighting. There is no sense in violence. There is only anger and hatred and pain. Ultimately there is death.
Can all the wrongs in the world be righted by the blood of innocents? Can it be put to right by the blood of the damned? Will the sins of this generation end if all the blood of the wrongdoers is spilt today? Or will we go on to make the same mistakes? Will we blindly follow the paths that seem so different to us, yet that lead us to the same end?
It seems that this is inevitable. Men are creatures of bloodshed and death. We are mortal, our lives brief. Yet we choose to throw it all away in the pursuit of glory, of honour, of happiness. We plant the seeds of our destructions in the fields of our success. Men are creatures who look at the future and therein lies our failure. Therein lies our weakness. Like the prophetess Cassandra who always predicted the future but was never believed, history cries out its warnings. Those warnings fall on deaf ears. Pleadings that drop like stones into the bottomless pools of ignorance.
We believe that we are invincible. We believe that we are smarter than our forefathers. We are not. We have technology that our ancestors did not, yet the same weakness runs in our veins. The same bloodlust. We have come a long way from the time of Achilles and Hector. Yet today a thousand Hectors and a thousand Achilles’ fight on and die on battlefields, uncounted, unsung, fallen heroes for whom there will be no tomorrow. For what did they give their lives? For whom did they shed their blood? Will it comfort their loved ones, now that they are dead and gone that they fought for honour? For glory? For what they believed was right.
Men say they fight because the other man does. The beginning has to come somewhere. Someone will have to stand up and say “I have seen the folly of our ways. It must end. Let it start with me.”
Just Me.
Monday, January 06, 2003
I was party to an interesting debate the other day. A friend of mine who had been in a bad relationship said “99.9% of all men cannot be trusted.” I don’t usually like general statements like that. I believe you should not generalize. The world is made up of individuals that cannot be put into convenient categories. It is not possible nor is it right to label people.
I believe that labeling people merely limits our understanding of them. If you walk into a relationship with a preconceived notion of how that person is, you rarely see past your own misconceptions. First impressions are the hardest to change and therefore have to be made with care. It is utter stupidity to dismiss someone based on the way that person looks or dresses. The truth is that many of us, myself included make split second judgments of people we have just met. That split second assessment is rarely correct. We can delude ourselves that we are perceptive. Many of my friends pride themselves on the imagined ability to assess someone at a glance. All they are doing is putting a label on them based on assumptions. Once the label is in place, it is virtually impossible to remove and therein lies the mistake. The person they have ‘assessed’ is not given a chance.
Meeting someone for the first time is a daunting prospect especially if it’s someone you want to make an impression on. It doesn’t get any easier either. I know how it is with me and I cannot speak for anyone else. I break out in a cold sweat and I agonize about what to say and how not to appear a complete moron. There have been occasions where I have jinxed myself. I agonize about what to say and how to say it and end up being a complete robot. If this isn’t an isolated example and I am hoping it isn’t, then there are people out there who have doomed themselves simply by being nervous. Who is the loser in scenarios like this one? Is it the person who makes a bad first impression and forever doomed to wear the label stuck on him by the other person? Or is it the other person, the one who has made a split second decision, possibly losing out on a good friend?
In my opinion, the loser will always be the hasty uncompromising person. We live in a world of contradictions. Simply because a person is uncomfortable in a social situation does not mean that they are uncouth. Simply because a person prefers casual dress does not make them a hippie. Slapping labels on people is very easy. In my opinion though, it deprives us. It deprives us of the opportunity of forming a lasting friendship. So go on give people a chance. If you leave your mind open, people will surprise you.
Just Me.
I believe that labeling people merely limits our understanding of them. If you walk into a relationship with a preconceived notion of how that person is, you rarely see past your own misconceptions. First impressions are the hardest to change and therefore have to be made with care. It is utter stupidity to dismiss someone based on the way that person looks or dresses. The truth is that many of us, myself included make split second judgments of people we have just met. That split second assessment is rarely correct. We can delude ourselves that we are perceptive. Many of my friends pride themselves on the imagined ability to assess someone at a glance. All they are doing is putting a label on them based on assumptions. Once the label is in place, it is virtually impossible to remove and therein lies the mistake. The person they have ‘assessed’ is not given a chance.
Meeting someone for the first time is a daunting prospect especially if it’s someone you want to make an impression on. It doesn’t get any easier either. I know how it is with me and I cannot speak for anyone else. I break out in a cold sweat and I agonize about what to say and how not to appear a complete moron. There have been occasions where I have jinxed myself. I agonize about what to say and how to say it and end up being a complete robot. If this isn’t an isolated example and I am hoping it isn’t, then there are people out there who have doomed themselves simply by being nervous. Who is the loser in scenarios like this one? Is it the person who makes a bad first impression and forever doomed to wear the label stuck on him by the other person? Or is it the other person, the one who has made a split second decision, possibly losing out on a good friend?
In my opinion, the loser will always be the hasty uncompromising person. We live in a world of contradictions. Simply because a person is uncomfortable in a social situation does not mean that they are uncouth. Simply because a person prefers casual dress does not make them a hippie. Slapping labels on people is very easy. In my opinion though, it deprives us. It deprives us of the opportunity of forming a lasting friendship. So go on give people a chance. If you leave your mind open, people will surprise you.
Just Me.
Monday, December 30, 2002
This is the age of the computer. Information is available throughout the world via the internet. Education is more readily available today then it was a hundred years ago. Women now contribute to the society not simply by being homemakers, they are out there making up a huge percentage of the workforce. There are women now in all walks of life. It has become commonplace for women to be in law enforcement, quick response teams, the military and many other fields which were previously dominated by men.
The women in these professions earned their places by hard work and dedication. Sometimes, they sacrificed everything they had to do their jobs. This has made it easier for other women to follow in their footsteps. Yet still all over the world women are oppressed. They are looked down upon in many ways. They are considered incapable of looking after themselves. Women are patronised and not only by religious fanatics who misinterpret the holy word but by well educated men and other women.
I have recently met a few people who consider the women they are dating to be totally incapable of taking care of themselves. One of them use the poor excuse that the woman he is dating is young and immature. While that may be true, she is not a total imbecile. This is just one of the many ways that women are looked down upon. Why is it that people are slowly accepting a woman's place in the workforce yet, consider women still totally incapable of self preservation?
It is in not merely annoying, it is insulting. Imagine telling a young professional man that it is not safe to take a cab home at night alone? He'd laugh. However, no one thinks twice about telling a woman the same thing. What makes a woman more vulnerable? This is the day and age where men are raped as well as women. We perpetuate the image that women are weaker and easier targets simply by handing out this random bits of advice. If more people started advicing men to be mor careful as well as women, perhaps a criminal will start thinking that maybe a women is not such an easy prey after all. People are people the world over. The fact the they are male or female is just a random choice of nature. Women don't have the words 'weaker sex' tattooed across their forehead and men are not stronger simply because they are men.
Start treating people as individuals and not as male or female. There are strong individuals and there are weak individuals, what gender they may be is completely irrelevant.
Just Me.
The women in these professions earned their places by hard work and dedication. Sometimes, they sacrificed everything they had to do their jobs. This has made it easier for other women to follow in their footsteps. Yet still all over the world women are oppressed. They are looked down upon in many ways. They are considered incapable of looking after themselves. Women are patronised and not only by religious fanatics who misinterpret the holy word but by well educated men and other women.
I have recently met a few people who consider the women they are dating to be totally incapable of taking care of themselves. One of them use the poor excuse that the woman he is dating is young and immature. While that may be true, she is not a total imbecile. This is just one of the many ways that women are looked down upon. Why is it that people are slowly accepting a woman's place in the workforce yet, consider women still totally incapable of self preservation?
It is in not merely annoying, it is insulting. Imagine telling a young professional man that it is not safe to take a cab home at night alone? He'd laugh. However, no one thinks twice about telling a woman the same thing. What makes a woman more vulnerable? This is the day and age where men are raped as well as women. We perpetuate the image that women are weaker and easier targets simply by handing out this random bits of advice. If more people started advicing men to be mor careful as well as women, perhaps a criminal will start thinking that maybe a women is not such an easy prey after all. People are people the world over. The fact the they are male or female is just a random choice of nature. Women don't have the words 'weaker sex' tattooed across their forehead and men are not stronger simply because they are men.
Start treating people as individuals and not as male or female. There are strong individuals and there are weak individuals, what gender they may be is completely irrelevant.
Just Me.
Thursday, December 05, 2002
Astrology, fortune telling, divination, tarot cards, cyrstal balls. Some of the methods used to tell the future. We're so preoccupied with the future. That's what we think about all the time. Everything we do is geared towards the future. In work, in study, in play no one thinks about where the are, except when they are thinking about it in relation to where the want to be. I am reminded of Yoda in the Empire Strikes Back. He was saying that Luke was always thinking of the future. His mind always on where he wanted to be never on where he is. I think that is true of all us. We spend our childhood eagerly waiting to grow up. Rushing toward it. Then we progress into our teens thinking we're adults. We rush about trying to be 'grown up'. We speed along the path looking ahead always trying to catch up and be somewhere else. We end up frustrated that we never get to where we're going because where we want to be is always far off in the future. We never realise that the reason for our unhappiness and frustration is our own ever changing expectations. Our expectations keep moving ahead. We reach the goals we set for ourselves today and then we discover that we've already set a new goal. Then we realise that we can never reach our goals because they move as we do. They move forward as we move forward. As if that isn't bad enough, we're also curious. There is a burning desire to know what lies in our future, to see if we can evade the bad luck that lies ahead. My cousin was told that in his future lies a terrible accident. Now he is sitting grounded by his mother because death is supposed to haunt him on wheels. I can't say I don't believe in divination but if we were to believe in everything that is predicted in our future, we'd never leave the house and still we'd die if our time were up. Live your life to the fullest. That way you die with no regrets. A friend once told me the most profound thing I have ever heard. He said, we start dying from the moment we are born. And if that is true and there is no doubt that it is, the only thing we can do is to enjoy the life that we have been given. We were put on this world to learn. We learn everyday. We have lessons that are taught to us everyday that we are alive. We learn to be better people. That's the meaning of life. If we were to concentrate on the present and a little less on the future, I have no doubt that we would be happier.
Always believe that where you are today is exactly where you were meant to be.
Just Me.
Always believe that where you are today is exactly where you were meant to be.
Just Me.
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