Motivation

I was an above average student. In primary school, in high school, in college and in university, I was always riding the top of the wave. I was never the best. I was too easily distracted and too lazy for that. It isn't something I can explain. I am intelligent, there is no doubt about that. What I lack is motivation. What I lack is ambition. I am quite happy to be middle of the way. That isn't true. I crave validation. I love being adored. I want to be looked up at. The problem then lays in the fact that I rarely want to work for it. That is also not completely true. I look back at my life and find that I have been happiest when I have been organising parties and functions. I like to solve problems and teach people how to do things. These are good things. I don't like deadlines. I don't like finicky people. I don't like it when people are disappointed in me.
Now I have an opportunity to work with my father. I do not want to work with my father. Never mind that, I don't even understand the damn work my father does! He expects me to be able to pick it up, it's "common sense" after all. I have found that with my father, "common sense" is really uncommon.
So where do I find the motivation? How do I pick myself up and get myself moving?
I think my get up and go has got up and went! If it was ever even there to begin with.
Just Me!